Morphed

That moment when you should be preparing for bed. Instead you begin a project that morphs into something completely different than what you set out to work on. While you are working on a morphed project it starts taking shape into so much more and better than the picture in your mind. This happened to me this week. Several nights in fact. I have the vision (and I still haven’t made it) for a piece that I want to create, so I sat down with my tools and materials. But as I was working something else happened…and it was awesome.
Creating, making, accomplishing and spending time at events meeting new people and talking about my process and jewelry is one of my top favorite things to do. Most times I get to also spend time with my family at these events which is great fun. This season has started off with a bang it is the beginning of May and we have already attended four…that’s right 4 events. It has been a great spring so far. Two events this month with a couple more in June.
I hope you are creating friends. I hope you are growing and trying new things. Testing your own limits. And busting through all those things people said you would never. If you don’t have anyone in your life telling you how amazing you are, let me tell you. YOU ARE AMAZING! Really you are! We can get through whatever season we are in with a little help and encouragement from our people. If you need people I’ll be your people!
We can do this together. We were created for relationship. Just remember big things my friends! Big things are coming! So until next we meet at the workbench…keep creating, enjoy your moments and keep your chin up. As always thank you for stopping by and for being on this journey with me.

Big Love,
Randi

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Disappointment and Delight

Disappointment is hanging over me like a cloud today. I did not expect to get accepted into that art show…but I was also really hoping I would. So when the email came in last night and it was a “you have not be chosen” letter it was a slam. It came on the heels of a not chosen email last week for an event I really thought I had a shot at.

Rejection, let’s call those emails what they are…rejections. Rejection cuts like a knife. When we expect it or try to prepare ourselves for it, we think when it comes in I’ll be fine. Then it comes and we are reminded we are not made of stone.  I know that I am not what they are looking for, or that one qualification is not quite met so I should know quickly that they don’t want me…just a few of the thoughts I tell myself to “prepare” for the rejection to come.  Then it comes in and BAM slammed. Because at our core we believe in fairy tales and wishes come true.

Maybe I am alone in this thought. I’m ok with that, but I wanted to let you know in case you are feeling alone in your rejections and “not chosen”ness, that I am right here with you. I spent two years looking for employment that met my needs and my family’s needs. Two years getting form rejection emails or no acknowledgement at all. Two years applying for jobs just to say I was putting in applications. Positions I could have done in my sleep. Yet, still the rejections came. I am working through the damage that was done. Because God loves me too much to leave me damaged. Working through it can be hard too. However, I am excited to see what is on the other side of this season. Until I get to the over side I am going to press in and get out of this season all that I can.

I have learned that getting the answer we want to the prayers we are praying does not always turn out how we picture them. I am learning that it is ok to not be ok. I am allowed to struggle with moments in my season. Some days are easier to walk through. Other days, like today, are harder. Is it just not getting a place at an art show for my small business…no there are other things on my mind. But I am going to tell this disappointment where it can go. I am going to read and reread this verse until it sinks deep into my soul and strengthens me…But his delight is in the law of the Lord, and on his law he meditates day and night. He is like a tree planted by streams of water, which yields its fruit in season and whose leaf does not wither. Whatever he does prospers. Psalms 1:2-3 NIV

That’s what I need today friends, to focus my delight, my mind, my heart back on the Lord. He has a plan that I cannot even imagine and so I am going to wait right here with my coffee.  He never leaves us, never forsakes us and never stops loving us. Even on days we are stuck in our feelings. He loves us too much to leave us there.

We can do this together. We were created for relationship. Just remember big things my friends! Big things are coming! So until next we meet at the workbench…keep creating, enjoy your moments and keep your chin up. As always thank you for stopping by and for being on this journey with me.

Big Love,                                                                                                                                                       Randi

Finding Blessings

Greetings Friends! I keep getting sidetracked from any type of consistent writing of the blog. For those of you who chose to join me on the journey I am deeply sorry.

By way of updating you…I am still working 72 hours a week. I have become so exhausted that I find myself letting things that are very important me slip. Writing this blog, continuing to self-educate with new skills and techniques and even as spending time at the bench. I have been soldering and making rings when I have some free time. They make me so very happy. Custom orders have seen a jump in the right direction. I find myself goofy girl smiling at that thought.

My favorite mini-cavegirl continues to amazing. She does not fully understand my crazy schedule and often asks me when I am coming and tells me multiple times daily that she misses. These questions both comfort me and break my heart. The hubs is still struggling to find full-time employment. Though he is working part-time which we are very thankful for.

You if think about us and would consider sending us some prayers, happy bubbles and good vibes we would greatly appreciate it!

I have posted some new earrings and some custom order rings…if you are looking for some items on your Christmas list. Let me know how I can help you check some names off.

Hope as Thanksgiving as come and gone and Christmas quickly approaches that you have found time to remind yourself of all the blessings that surround you. They are there…take a minute to find them. I find it relieves some of the tension and stress. So until next we meet at the workbench…keep creating, enjoy your moments and keep your chin up. As always thank you for stopping by and for being on this journey with me.

Big Love,
Randi

Vivid Brain Space

I have spent every day of my conscious life vividly remembering memories, which are constantly being mocked, belittled or devalued. But you see the problem with that is an individual’s memories and perceptions of those memories are what shape them into the people they become. No one has the right to take them away from another individual.

            Let me explain what I mean by conscious life.  Because let’s face it, hopefully each day since your birth you have been conscious. I simply mean that there comes a time in (well again hopefully) each individual’s life where they become acutely aware of their everyday. Aware of each memory. Aware (once again hopefully) of each moment. I have been acutely aware of my vivid memories since my pre-adolescent stage of development. I did not grasp then the importance or even the significance of those vivid thoughts, memories, dreams, daydreams and recollections. I am not sure I have fully grasped them now. But I do welcome them.

           I do attempt every day to use them to better myself, to shape my mini cave-girl, to push myself farther than I have ever been, and not allow myself to fall into old traps. There are have been many days since I began this leg of my journey that I have wanted to crawl up in a corner of the closet, cover my head with a blanket and stay there. Stay there until things changed. Stay there until improvements in my life happen. But that is not how it works. We have to fight for ourselves (for often no one else will…but we have to remember they have to fight for themselves). We have to choose (sometimes multiple times a day) to make take control of our futures and turn the negative situations and experiences in our lives and make them positive.

            ImageI am reminded in those moments of weakest that I have overcome so many trials and walked through so many valleys. Losing people who are close to you breaks you in a way you did not know you could be broken. Being told without blunt words, that you are not good enough…begins to cut into you (One of the many reasons I believe passionately in being honest…even if it means being blunt).  When you allow those experiences and situations to empower you they no longer have that negative hold on your life. Remember the good moments with those gone and what the not so good moments with them taught you. Knowing for yourself that you are enough (live on your own away from everyone you know…most empowering thing you can do). I am also reminded that when those trails were occurring I made the choice to get up, pull on my big girl pants and push through. I found this image on pinterest.com, the blog is blocked so sadly I cannot give credit where it is due…however the words are of the most importance. “Don’t forget you’re human, It’s okay to have a meltdown, just don’t unpack and live there. Cry it out and then refocus on where you are headed.”

            How are you using your memories to move you forward into your future? Demons and angels, smiles and tears all lay and wait for us as we stroll down memory lane. But how you maneuver down that street also helps shape your future. I have to remember every day that I have walked through some intense valleys. But I am still standing. You are standing my friend. Now chin up, buttercup, and look your future in the eye, and take control. Let’s enjoy this ride.

 

Big Love,                                                                                                                                                                                                   Randi